(5-minute Read) A friend posted an article on Facebook about the ‘purity culture’ prevalent in religion, and particularly in American evangelical Christianity.
I was struck by how religious corruptions of modesty have made women into devilish creatures walking around tempting decent men. This religious abomination divides men and women respectively into self-righteous agents of God’s will, and inferior beings not to be trusted. It’s no wonder misogynism is rife.
Still the Dark Ages
I thought most of this had been left in the days preceding the enlightenment. But not so, I feared. It is still implicitly pervasive, if not explicitly stated, in our cultures, especially where religion plays a major role in shaping them.
As I looked at the post, another Facebook user – not one of my friends – commented, as if to confirm my fear. He wrote to the affect that it is not helpful to go to the other extreme. He wrote that we should not be telling women that using their bodies for fun is the right thing to do, as this results in decent men rejecting them due to their past promiscuity.
Now, I’m a peaceful person – or at least I am committed to trying to be peaceful. But this comment got me fired up for a whole lot of reasons.
What Was He Thinking?
Firstly, who are the ‘we’ he refers to that should not be telling women things? Are ‘we’ the men? And are the women then just compliant sub-men, waiting for us to tell them what is right and wrong? I reject that vehemently – so that little word ‘we’ waved like a red flag in front of my eyes in the Facebook comment box.
I had to ask, firstly, why he felt men should (and could) ‘reject’ women, and secondly, what defined this ‘decency’ he claimed.
He responded with a long rant about me demonising someone (him) who holds sex sacred, and rolled out a whole litany of arguments defending his views. His views, and his self-righteous tone, were so foreign to my mind set that I didn’t know where to begin to respond – so I didn’t. I decided to write this blog article instead. Besides, we were off the topic of my friend’s original post.
Since my friend’s posted article was in a religious context, let’s stay in that context.
The Problem of Self-Righteousness
Self-righteousness is common among religious people. It has its roots in the strong man archetype – the domineering ruler over the Earth, and patriarchal leader of the family. The male god. But self-righteousness doesn’t only appear in misogynistic men today – it rears its ugly head whenever bigots place themselves above other tribes. And it’s not only a religious phenomenon. It’s an ego-perseverance thing.
The perfect contemporary example of the violent, self-righteous and powerful man is Samuel L. Jackson in Pulp Fiction. You know the scene – the one voted the fourth best movie speech in history – where he quotes Ezekiel 25:17* just before he and John Travolta pump some poor dude full of lead.
* Note: most of the speech is not in Ezekiel 25:17. The speech is actually a string of phrases taken out of context from other places in the Bible. But the last two sentences are Ezekiel 25:17. The whole thing is often erroneously believed to come from the Old Testament.
Jackson’s famous words are: “The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he, who in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of darkness, for he is truly his brother’s keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who would attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know my name is the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon thee.”
Dramatic stuff. It gets the blood pumping for anyone who feels inclined to attack an outsider – to attack that which is perceived as a threat to personal and/or group identity. Self-righteousness is glorified as the way to get ahead and to win. It’s as much a foundation of nationalism, racism or any other ‘ism’ as it is at the heart of sexism.
Pulp Fiction’ Quentin Tarantino leaves us with the message that self-righteousness has to go. Jackson’s character has a change of heart towards the end of the movie.
But unfortunately, it’s the impassioned speech, building up to explosive violence that sticks in our popular culture – as evidenced by it being rated so highly by the voting public.
The Worst Kind: Against Women
Let’s turn specifically to the subject of self-righteousness against women. My friend’s article shows it’s still very prevalent in Christian ‘purity’ circles. It underlies women’s tolerance of misogynistic men, and men’s presumptions that they have a right to judge a woman’s sexuality and how she chooses to express it.
But what did Jesus say about women and their sexual wrong-doing.
Consider three Bible verses:
- John 8:1-11. The adulteress.
- Luke 7:36-50. The weeping woman.
- Matthew 21:31. Publicans and prostitutes.
I won’t repeat the verses here, but they tell us the following through one of the wisest voices in history:
- Don’t judge or condemn anyone for you have no idea what is in their heart and what they’ve been through. Rather view everyone with understanding and compassion.
- Look rather at yourself. Consider your wounds and the aspects of yourself and your life that have lead you to where you are. Apply the same compassion.
- Hold up unconditional love as paramount in your life. And with this comes unconditional forgiveness.
- Be careful not to be deceived by hypocrites. In the Matthew verse above, Jesus tells the chief priests, the teachers of the Law and the Jewish authorities in the Temple that prostitutes are ahead of them on the way to the kingdom of Heaven. This is surely the ultimate indictment against self-righteousness, which is always hypocritical because none of us is perfect. It’s a pity this speech is not voted amongst the best of all time.
So, in conclusion, let us stop looking down on others. Let us focus on, and manifest, the streams of unconditional love and peace that exist in all our religions, and all our hearts. We are all wounded – those who stop looking outward and accept their own wounds with love and forgiveness, will be healed. This is a powerful psychological dictum today… and it is as ancient as the earliest wisdom traditions. Love can heal our own psyches, and it can heal our societies.
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